LEPER
THIS NEXT SONG IS ABOUT DEATH
2020

ÙRNAIGH AN TIGHEARNA / PRAYER OF THE LORD

In ainm an Athair, agus an Mhic, agus Spiorad Santo

Ar n-Athair a tha air nèamh 
Gu naomhaichear d’ainm
Thigeadh do rìoghachd
Dèanar do thoil 
Air an talamh mar a nìthear air nèamh
Tabhair dhuinn an diugh ar n-aran làitheil
Agus maith dhuinn ar fiachan
Amhail mar a mhaitheas sinne d’ar luchd-fiach
Agus na leig ann am buaireadh sinn
Ach saor sinn o olc
Oir is leatsa an rìoghachd
Agus an cumhachd, agus a’ ghlòir, gu sìorraidh
Amen
  
FAR A BHEIL DO GHATH? / WHERE IS THY STING?

I tell you this
Flesh and blood cannot inherit 
The Kingdom of God
I tell you this
We will not all sleep 
But we shall be changed...

Where is thy sting?

I tell you this
In a twinkling of an eye
The trumpet will sound and we shall be changed
The corruptible will go on to be incorruptible
And death will be swallowed in victory...

LAMHAN CRAICEANN / SKELETON HANDS

I was the one - asked the question
Pleased to believe - anyone would
I was the one - asked the question
Pleased to believe anyone would know

Up against the wall - of illusion 
Marvel at the fact - everyone was
Up against the wall - of illusion 
Marvel at the fact - everyone was gold

Skeleton hands - on the wall
Skeleton hands - like a hollow wind
Skeleton hands - I remember
Skeleton hands - reaching up again

I never felt so unprepared 
Cover death, no don't pretend 
It isn’t coming to your door
The author understands us all
What happens to the least of these
When all are cold and threatening?
Where do you go when you leave?
Can anybody answer me?

13 PEILEARAN AIRGID / 13 SILVER BULLETS

I've got thirteen silver bullets in a glass by the bed
Garlands of fresh rye and monkshood by the door

Everyone loves a good story
Boy do I think I've got a doozy
She seems to be in love with the moon
Stares out the window to bathe in the gloom
I'm never sure what she's been drinking
I'm never sure what she's been thinking
I'm never sure if I need to be ready for 
The next time the moon is full

Can't really tell how old she is
Doesn’t really matter as long as she is
I think I'm getting used to the unprovoked rage
Not really bothered by the restlessness
In fact I kinda like the increasing aggression
Even though I don’t always feel I sleep safe
Considering I love her like I do
The last thing I want is to shoot

I've got thirteen silver bullets in a glass by the bed
Garlands of fresh rye and monkshood by the door

In the night she says she hears the stars singing
Whispering to her with all their secrets
Sometimes I can swear I've seen her aura shifting
Into a vicious mood
She's always been a little bizarre
So maybe these bristles under her tongue are
Just a way to justify my fear of the unknown

FON GHREIN / BENEATH THE SUN

This is the evil that takes place in all things
The same destiny overtakes all
The hearts of men moreover 
Are filled with evil and madness
After they join the dead the living have hope
This is the evil that takes place in all things
Beneath the sun

For the living know that they will die
They know that they will have no further reward
And they are forgotten
Their loves, their hates 
Their jealousy will long since have vanished
Never again will they have part
In anything that takes place 
Beneath the sun

I saw the tears of the oppressed and they had no comforter
Power was on the side of the oppressors 
Declare the dead who are already dead 
Are happier than the living who are still alive
But better than both of these are those 
Who have not been born yet
Those who have not yet beheld the evil that is done

The fool will fold his hands 
And simply ruin himself
Better one handful of tranquility 
Than two with toil
Chase the wind, chase the wind, look again
Behold the evil 
Beneath the sun

OIDHCHE MHATH / GOOD NIGHT

Mourners grieve for those who are asleep
They fear they have to grieve like all the rest
Those who rest in peace will not sleep for long
Oidhche mhath

He will bring with Him those who have fallen asleep
Those of us who are left we will not preceed
He will bring with Him those who have fallen asleep
Those of us who are left we will not preceed

So until that day
Why don't we just say
Oidhche mhath

He Himself will come down with a loud command
And the dead in Christ will be the first to rise
He Himself will come down with a loud command
And the dead in Christ will be the first to rise

So even though we grieve
Encourage us to see
The light is all we need to find our way
As for the ones we've lost
They will not sleep for long
We know one day that we will see them again

AN TE DHORCHA / THE DARK ONE

I am the dark one 
I am the dark one in love with the light
Desired servant of everything that is right 
Still the slave of everything that is vile 
Drunk on the blackest of wine
Till my skull is split 
From the riddles, from the riddles
Till my heart becomes pure, nothing but sorrow awaits
Till my blood becomes clear, death is where I dwell
Till You call me forth from the grave
Nothing but sorrow awaits at the end of the trail
Death is where I dwell, death is where I dwell
Till You call me forth from the grave
Till You call me forth
Call me forth from the grave…

TAILLEADH / CHANGELING

I need mercy, you need mercy
We find mercy on our knees

And it’s getting ever darker here
Ever colder and alone
Never thought that I could fall so far
Amazed by how vile I've become

Am I changing into something else
Less than holy, less than righteous now
Forgotten all that I knew once
Trading pearls for swine and filth
Behold my bed, a field of stones
Realm of shadow and despair
Misery is all that I have left
Cannot recall my way back

FAIC FAS AN ROMANS / WATCH THE ROMANCE DIE

We are not so much
As animals, my dear
Even though I do suppose
Behave as them, I fear
We bite and scratch over this and that
And I can be so cruel
But in spite of all the venom in my kiss
You know I do love you

And pay no mind, don’t even mind the dragon in my glare
When, held up to the passion in my eyes
I hope it won't compare

Ravage my heart with but a glance of your eye
We have no right to ever forget why

I looked into the cavity 
My chest remembering
My heart was missing right from where 
I know it used to be
You’ve let me take your heart out 
And replace it with my own
The Sovereign has delivered yours
It's beating right in here, you know

I don’t even mind, don’t even mind the spiders in her hair
When held up to the glass in her eyes, they just don’t compare
I don’t even mind, don’t even mind the serpent in her stare
In spite of all the venom in her kiss, at least I know that she’s still there

Irony, principalities, the ruler of the air
Wants nothing less than our destruction 
Pain beyond compare

The Sovereign has decreed that we enjoy each other's lives
We must refuse to just sit back and watch the romance die
The Sovereign has decreed that we enjoy each other's lives
We must refuse to just sit back and watch the romance die

A 'CRUINNEACHADH DORCHADAS / GATHERING DARKNESS

Sorrow
Fear
Hatred
Malice
Destruction

I've gathered all the darkness I could find
To glean which pieces I would like

Magic
Rage
Murder
Deceit
Oppression
Corruption

A Thiarna Iosa, let Your words be hidden in my heart
That I might seek Your face

I have explored every pleasure that I could
And I have discovered none of them could fulfill me

MACH AS AN T-SLOC SEO / OUT OF THIS PIT

I know You want me to come home
But the black things inside of my soul     
Convince me to stay
They scream so loud, they scream so loud
Try as I may I just cannot drown them out
They scream so loud, they scream so loud
Try as I may I just cannot drown them out

Where is the exit?...
I have been searching for the exit...
Where is the exit?
I have been searching for the exit...
Take me out of this pit
Pull me out of this pit
This pit of slime, this pit of slime
This black pit of slime 
Black slime, black as ink
This black pit of slime
The arms in the wall...
Reaching through the cracks in the wall...
The shadows are blocking the hall
Their shadows are blocking the hall
All of the arms are reaching through
The cracks in the wall
Are blocking the hall
The shadows are blocking the hall

Pull me out of this pit
Of black things, of claws and jagged teeth
And filth and stink and hate and fear
Pull me out 

For I do want to hear You again
I still want to hear You again...
When You speak

For I still want to hear you again...
When You speak

Release me, release me

Where is the exit?…
Pull me out of this pit
This pit of slime
Black slime, black slime
Black as ink, black as tar
This black pit of slime
Where the arms are
The arms in the wall, the cracks in the wall...
And the shadows are blocking the hall…

And the voices they lie…
But I will believe, I do believe
That You are exactly who You say You are…
I will believe, I do believe
I will not be convinced otherwise
For I am Your sheep
And I know Your voice...
For I still want to hear You...
When you speak...
I still want to hear You...
I will believe, I do believe
I will not be convinced otherwise
Those voices they lie
Defend me from those lies
Defend me from the voices that lie
Defend me from the arms
From the cracks in the hall 
And the shadows when they pull and they call
I still want to hear You...
When you speak…

THA THU NAOMH / YOU ARE HOLY

You are the one who has lifted me up
Out of the jaws of the ravenous one
For the enemy seeks for my destruction
You are the ransom of life and the king on the throne 
The resolution at the end of the drone

You are the morning, You are the light 
You are the day, You are the night
You are thy guidance, You are the Son
Miraculous Christ, the merciful one

You are the truth, the way, and the life 
Defending my honor from Lucifer's lie
You are the shepherd who cares for the flock 
Beaten and battered, You will bandage me up

I am the one who has wandered away
You forgive my transgressions and called me by name
You are holy

 

Music and lyrics by Skot Shaw
Leper is: Skot Shaw (vox, guitars, synth, drum programming), Jennifer Mercy (vox), Justin Filizola (vox, synth), Colleen Davick (vox, flute)
Alternate song titles are in Scots Gaelic 
Recorded and mixed by Ed Bialach
Mastered by Trevor Sadler at Mastermind Productions
Graphics by Juan Garzon
Photos by Skot Shaw, Rachel Shaw, and Juan Garzon
©&℗ 2019 Grrr Music (ASCAP)

Gang vocals on "Where Is Thy Sting" and "Beneath the Sun":
Stewart Brown, Scott Cifone, Colleen Davick, Darren Davick, Justin Filizola, Meghan Filizola, Sonia Lyle, Mellie Manfredi, Rachel Shaw, Bob Thompson, Alice Waterbury, Ryan Wendt, Sarah Wendt

 

 

 

 

 

LEPER 
BEAUTIFUL GRAY DAY
2012

ASCOLTA / HARKEN
Music: Cecily Marx, Lyrics: Skot Shaw

Harken aquista parole amorai mio
Fela del leluna amorai mio
Sonostat de orcastrati per vui amorai mio

COSA VUOLE DIRE MORIRE / WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO DIE 

Why does it fall, where does it end
Where does it come from, where has it been
What does it look like, is it decay
One of his faces will find you one day

What is it waiting for, how can it win
How will it find me, when the stinger slides in
What does it sound like, can I smell it at all
All of his faces continue to call    

Does it disturb you, mysterious wind
Does it control you, cut you within
Is it defeated, by the blood engine
Where all of his faces, silenced again

What do you think it means…

PERSEGUITA / HAUNT

If you were first to go I won't be parted from your face 
Perhaps I'd spend the rest of my life laying across your grave
If it were me I'd want to say I'd try to find a way 
Promising to haunt you the rest of your days

Darlin' close your eyes - the wolves howl tonight
And imagine that it's me - serenade you oh so sweetly
Darlin' close your eyes

We all know the rule applies
Appointing once to die
If flights of fancy ease the pain of loss 
Then someone tell me why I'd be condemned to be tormented, tormented by your ghost 
Or gladly embrace madness to retain the love I scarcely did deserve

Darlin' close your eyes - the wolves howl tonight
And imagine that it's me - serenade you oh so sweetly 
Darlin' close your eyes - the moon is full and bright

Dancing here within the fog - memories of your lost love
The agony of pressing on - letting go when shadows fall
Finding all was never lost - lie alone within the dark 
Crushing hearts - we’ve come undone 
I don’t mean to rattle on - it's just one fear that I dwell on
That from this world if you were gone - and I'm alone to greet the dawn
There’s just one thing that I would want - Darling haunt me            
 
LA PIOGGIA TRISTE TRISTE / THE SAD SAD RAIN
  
Last night sorrow came faster than a heart can break
Common law, common fall, burning was no fun at all
Draw the line every time, lonely is a bitter wine
Open wound doesn’t heal, bitterness is all too real
Always good sabotage, once again and all is lost
Here it comes, something felt, try again with someone else
When it’s gone, sow and till, close in for another kill
One on one, weighs a ton, love the unfamiliar song
Playing house, make it sing, giving away everything
Stop yourself, give in to fear, what if you don’t want it here
I've finally grown accustomed to the sound of the rain
Every time it falls it sounds exactly the same
Sort of romantic, nullifying the pain
Funny how you can't escape a common cliché

FAI COME VUOI / DO AS THOU WILT

Don’t tell me what to do, I will not submit to you
My moral standard is my own 
Oppressive obligations are your throne
My only desire is to feed
I will not be denied

Do as thou wilt
Everyone suffers
Do as thou wilt
Nobody wins
Do as thou wilt
Makes you evil
Do as thou wilt
To the heretic's end

I will not be forgiven, for I am not asking  
Vacantly staring 
Admiring my reflection and all that I’ve acquired

Is there credit for trying 
Does it just mean I'm lying
Could it be that I'm buying
To a truth of denying
 
Isn’t it enough that I attend 
Even if its just to ease my conscience again

Do as thou wilt
Everyone suffers
Do as thou wilt
Nobody wins
Do as thou wilt
Makes you evil
Do as thou wilt
To the heretic's end

Behold the mirror
That contains my soul
As I turn to leave, your image fades away
To indulge in one more nail

ODIO TUTTO / I HATE EVERYTHING 

Yesterday the clock went off at 8
But I just lay there, let it ring, couldn’t face the day 
One more day digging holes for myself to lie in 
I’ve been laying here since 4 a.m. 
God, when does it end
It's just too hard, just too cold, just too hopeless so I’m told
Am I bleeding, I can't tell  
So I make believe that all is well    

All the trees and happy things are smiling, smiling back at me
So I just pluck out my own eyes, just lay here until I die            

Drug myself, go back to sleep, if that wont work I'll watch TV
I seem to hate everything, I don’t know what’s wrong with me       

Because I just feel like giving, but when everything is said and done
I know I can't hide for long before you step in to spur me on

I think I heard somebody say it’s a beautiful gray day
I don’t have to face it alone, even when there’s nobody home        

I think I heard somebody say it’s a beautiful gray day
I don’t have to face it alone, even when there’s nobody home                             

LACRIME NERE / JET BLACK TEARS
Music: Skot Shaw, Lyrics Roy Montroy and Skot Shaw

Jet-black tears from your eyes          
Jet-black tears from the sky 
Too much weeping, too much fear 
A wish to see all things clear

Jet-black tears from your eyes          
Jet-black tears from the sky
   
No more running away
No more day like today
All things good, all thing pure  
These are the things that will endure
Across the vast universe
He wants to free us from every curse 
Derangement, madness, death and love
Cold and bleeding from above 

Jet-black tears from your eyes          
Jet-black tears from the sky

NON HO PIU PAURA DI DORMIRE / I’M NOT AFRAID TO SLEEP ANYMORE

I have come to a decision, I refuse to fear them
Those who torment me in my sleep
Just after I doze off, just before I begin to dream 
There they are, poking and touching 
With fingers that no one can see

The intrusion that I perhaps instigate
By entertaining them somehow by day to day
But I will change my focus
Follow He who is beyond the sky
And There the resistance shall begin 

I will pray... savagely  
I will pray... violently 
I will pray... earnestly 
I will pray   

Just after I doze off 
Just before I begin to dream
Shall his angel defend me
Romantic notion, yes, I know 
Even though sounds a lot like superstition 
Even still it seems to be working

The intrusion that I perhaps instigate 
By entertaining them somehow by day to day
But I will change my focus 
Follow He who is beyond the sky
And There the resistance shall begin

I will pray... savagely  
I will pray... violently 
I will pray... earnestly 
I will pray   

L’ARTISTA DENTRO DI TE / THE ARTIST IN YOU
Music: Skot Shaw and Ken Lemery, Lyrics: Skot Shaw

I hope I'm driving you crazy
I bet I'm making you blush
Just proclaiming the truth of who sends me
And hope it isn’t too much
I hope you're wanting to meet me
The stars really love to be touched
Once upon a time I really wanted to reach out
In my fame somehow I forgot

I'll get a man of the cloth to ordain me
The forces of darkness to be stomped
If I subject you to my favorite vulgarities 
We all know you would be eating it up

It doesn’t bother me if you worship me
In the end all I wanted was attention from you

You say you don’t understand me
Don’t really care if you do  
It doesn’t matter in the long run anyway
No one rocks harder than you

It doesn’t bother me if you worship me
In the end all I wanted was attention from you

Is it glory to God 
Is it glory to me
Is adoration worth
All my integrity
Is it freedom of speech
If I say what I believe
I make every attempt 
To help the blind to see
Is it freedom of art 
When I just do as I please
But turn my back on all responsibility

SPEZZA SPEZZA SPEZZA / CHOP CHOP CHOP

One more button, one more push
One more word was all it took 

Snap that chord to set me off
Words are weapons, chop chop chop

Try to stop, it keeps coming
Try to uphold, I keep falling

Sound asleep across my tongue
All but sodden what have I done

You were the beast who chained me down
Shaves my hair and makes me frown

So many choices, most of them bad
Too much freedom in my hands 

Hang myself with my own rope
Watch your mouth, I hope you choke

Maddening voices make them stop
Words are weapons, chop chop chop

SE SOLO IO / IF ONLY I 

Blood is to live, life is to love
But the black holds me down, earthbound
Faith is to stretch across the sky 
Heaven waits, does she wait in vain
Free in you, free indeed
Watch me crawl, watch you bleed
Bring to pass just one thing
For, you see, you’ve cut too deep

IL MODO CHE TUTTO SI SVELA / THE WAY IT ALL UNFOLDS
Music: Ken Lemery, Lyrics: Robert Goodwin

That's the way it all unfolds 
Stories clear, master told
To love the least of these is loving me

Broken window, orphaned child 
Prison man lost defiled
Increases their shame, outcome the same

That’s the way it all unfolds 
To welcome strangers from the cold
Let the king say
You’ve welcomed him 

Sheep on the right, goats on the left
Truth be told there should be no rest 
When you neglect the ones the world rejects

That’s the way it all unfolds 
Stories clear, master told
To love the least of these is loving me

 

Leper is Skot Shaw (vox, guitars, synth, drum programming), Otto Jensen (bass), Cecily Marx (synth, violin, bgvs)
Alternate song titles in Italian with the help of Alana Hurst
Produced by Leper
Recorded and mixed by Ed Bialach
Mastered by Trevor Sadler at Mastermind Productions
All songs written by Leper except where noted
©&℗ 2012 Grrr Music (ASCAP)

 

 

 

 

 

 

LEPER
GOODBYE CLEVELAND
2011

HOLDING

suspended isolation
wax dripping on my hand
burning, burning, burning but I don't feel

cares of my life (stolen from my head)
shield me from strife (all of the tears I've shed)
holding, holding, holding me close to you 

mercy overwhelming do I hide 
shrouded by the darkness I abide 
is it true your love will never die 
is it true you radiate the night

I approached the chair 
they say that no one sits there 
but I see the eyes 
of the one who has written life 
holy, holy, holy the Risen King 
holy, holy, no matter what you think

VEXED

angry frustration 
nagging laughing in my face oh
no one knows how it feels 
no one's there when you need them most
haunting rage ties the ropes 
that tempt me into violence 
and I would like to scratch holes across my face

But you can keep your advice 
I don't want your words of wisdom 
I don't need them they won't help me 
when I'm all alone and helpless, 
a gentle hand is what I need 
outspoken words just seem to feed 
the rage that's nagging at my soul
don't say a word just take a hold
and finally help me realize 
I'm still precious in His Eyes

hold my breath and then it's gone 
what was wrong life in general
nothing extra nothing more 
Jesus lead me through the door 
that leads me out of this world into the next
out of my circumstances

but I have not left it I'm still here 
or I'm forced to face my fears 
so I can honestly offer 
to anyone who cares 
a miracle cure for the troubled soul

SOMETIMES

sometimes I like to sit and talk 
about the things I'm going through
sometimes I like to sit and listen 
intently to you

sometimes I like to sit and stare 
at her eyes lit by the Sun
and I'm always overwhelmed 
by the things that you have done

sometimes I feel I haven't reached you 
with the groaning in my heart
but my faith always reminds me 
that you've been there from the start

sometimes the only thing I hear 
is condemnation in my ear
you're the one who always erases me 
you're the one who draws me clear

here I am reaching out to you 
drowning in reality 
take my hand let me walk with you
across the sea

AUTUMN

autumn comes with her 
pretty dead leaves on the ground 
and you ridicule me again
the winter snows they fall like 
picture postcards in the yard 
and you forget me again
when the spring fills the air with her perfume 
you insult me again

don't you see you're created for intimacy 
I'm calling you come back to me

every beauty in this world 
every beauty that you see 
was created for you
thunder fills the hearts of man with fear 
I outline the clouds with lightning 
still you break my heart again
and the ocean like my love 
so deep and clear that makes you 
fear if you fall in it you will drown

don't you see you're created for intimacy
I'm calling you
don't you see you're created for intimacy 
I'm calling you come back to me

THOSE WINDOWS

she sits alone with her thoughts and it seems 
that they don't have room for me
who can say what goes on behind those windows 
if no light can reach

and there's someone at the door 
that she doesn't want to see
and there's something on the floor 
that I don't want to be

is it hate? is it murder? 
is there anyone who can reach her? 
is it love? is it trust? 
is there anyone who can teach her?

ROMANTICISTIC

alone he views the rain 
dancing down the window pane 
just another pathetic cliché 
of love discarded and vows misplaced 
she says they've grown apart 
no big deal or broken heart 
wipe away the slate 
with a brand new start 
and a brand new mate

as Christ loves the Church
and gave his life for her

unbridled carnality 
the destroyer of the least of these 
place us for fools strip us of our rights to choose 
faithful love over solitude 
when it gets hard she'll take the selfish route 
instead of fighting to work things out 
but anything worth having at all 
is worth fighting for and discarding walls

tell me what does it mean 
till death do us part I belong to thee 
shudder to think we'd say such things 
and never ever really take them seriously 
when the two make one 
I guess there's something glorious 
about looking into one's eyes 
and knowing where security lies

WONDERFUL GRAVE

what a shame I think I'm wasting away 
and there's nothing anyone can do
to wither and die is the only thing 
I can see waiting at the end of the day

the future I see is helpless and bleak 
but I don't want to let it get me down
everyone around me has forgotten I'm here 
and the train's pulling out of town

should I wrestle away from this bright shiny day? 
would you notice if you found me at all? 
I believe that my faith is a wonderful grave 
but I keep feeling like I'm somebody's dog

should I wrestle away from this bright shiny day? 
would I notice if you find me at all? 
I believe that my faith is a wonderful grave 
but I keep feeling like I'm somebody's dog

CRUSH KILL DESTROY

as it moves through the night 
ruin everything in its path
nothing left standing
leave nothing intact
nothing worth saving 
no escaping that fact

crush kill destroy

nothing left standing
nothing intact
my rage still swelling 
changes nothing 
no escaping that fact

THE FIEND IN THE WOODS

instrumental

Prior to moving to Chicago and joining Jesus People, Skot Shaw was creating music with his friends in Cleveland, OH. These songs, written by Skot along with Sean Ferrell and Ernie Gilkes, were performed here by Skot as a solo musician and released under the Leper moniker. This project represents the beginnings of the band that would later become Leper.

Leper is: Skot Shaw (lead vocals, guitar, drum programming)
©&℗ 2011 Grrr Records

 

 

 

 

 

LEPER 
AND EVERYBODY DIED
2009

Death is unavoidable. It claims everyone and instills many with fear and dread. Yet children, having no understanding of death, have no fear of death. They are content to live out their lives sitting on the floor coloring, never giving death a second thought. Jesus insists that we live as children, free of fear and without dread. Death was never the end of the story, only the interlude, the turning of the page. So let us not fear the things we cannot control; for in the end, everybody lived as they chose to live... and everybody died.

PRIMUL / THE FIRST

It’s been years I’ve traveled the sand
Most of the time the only prints I see are my own
I’ve heard it said that’s when I’m carried
But on the downswing it always seems
This does not apply to me

Here I hang from a thread - choking, strangling 
See a wounded mouse 
Blindly follow, filled with doubt and despair too dark to mention
Desperately trusting The First Whom I cannot see

Surely You have not led me this far to abandon me unto death
But with my waking eyes I see my whole world crashing down around me
I have not forgotten where You’ve led me from
So even though it seems I’ll lose everything I value
Still I will not curse You

Here I hang from a thread - choking, strangling
See a wounded mouse 
Blindly follow, filled with doubt and despair too dark to mention
Desperately trusting The First

IA CA VREI / TAKE WHAT YOU WANT

I’ve been wrong more than I’ve been right
Fooling myself painted with pride
Angels of death darkness and light
Kissing my forehead
Beautifully tasted their dreams - sown shut my eyes

What do you want from me?

Mongrels and goats
They were the golden hooks in my nose
Fall on my knees Lift up my face
No longer deny Wonderful grace
You make me cry - with one drop of blood

What do you want from me?

You took my hate
replaced it with love
You took the coal that healed my tongue
You took my death
replaced it with life
You drove out the horrors that possessed my mind
You showed me peace
when I had none
Shown me forgiveness
forgot what I’d done
You gave me the sky
You gave me the sea

Take what You want from me

LYKEN / WEREWOLF

On the prowl again
You’d hear something growling from the shade if you’d listen
Fierce malicious malevolence to deny thy forbearance
Lovers of fear and superstition
After all there’s something sinister about everything we love
Elusive as any fox - far more dangerous
Desperate struggle to maintain humanity
But if you quarrel with one of them remember to watch your step
At a half past twelve he will come back to kill you where you stand

The nature of a beast is to behave as a beast
But the nature of redemption is to allow yourself to be changed

AI GRIJA CE SPUI / WATCH WHAT YOU SAY 

Words of malice
Burn and break
Sarcastic needles like a mouth full of blades
Cut me down to lift yourself up

You better watch what you say

Showing no discretion
Left with no resolve
Do you really think you gain respect
If your words destroy them all?

Digging ever deeper
The hole that you’ve been living in
Keeping yourself isolated
Aggression your defense
Priding yourself on just how well you speak your mind

You better watch what you say

Has your tongue been tamed?
Are you a perfect man?
Have you truly been redeemed
Of all the pride and arrogance?
Try so hard
Still no one’s impressed

You better watch what you say

LINS / LICK 

Behold and see that nail-scarred hand
reaching out to me, should I take hold?
Maybe I should scream,
maybe I’ll just take a chance
You might prove Yourself to me

You have been my hiding place
You have led me into grace
Rescue me out of the flames of hell
that seek to lick the back of my neck

I have trusted You -
You have never failed
When Satan tries to rape my mind
Let it be he who fails
In all my trials through and through
You’ve delivered me
When the enemy comes in like a flood 
Lord lay my enemy at my feet

You have been my hiding
place, You have led me into grace
Rescue me out of the flames of hell
that seek to lick the back of my neck

VOAL NEGRU DE DANTELA / BLACK LACY VEIL

I would behold You but they will not let me be
For I would long to be the way it used to be
Within a folded blind a lie of constant make believe
In them find ecstasy the deeper that we sink

The faces are so soothing and pretty, petting my eyes
Why are they always talking? They are the stain in my eye

Delete the history and still they block my view
I cannot escape the digitizing swoon
Angelic form to cloud the window mock and tie
And only One can wipe the stain out of my eyes

Have I become the pretty picture of distress?

CASCA / HEAD CASE

I’ve got this voice inside my head 
I can’t help but want to tell you what it says 
Even though I don’t think that you really want to hear it 
And I’m sure you’ll roll your eyes instead 
I don’t want to tell you what to think 
And I would never treat you like a fink 
If I try to pass off my opinion for a fact 
Wouldn’t that make me a liar and a thief 

And if I’m going crazy I’d like to take you with me 

So don’t look at me like I’m completely nuts 
I can assure you that I’m certainly not 
I’m sure I look like some hysterical fool 
But love is He and He is love 

So if I’m going crazy I’d like to take you with me 

No one in the world can shut me up 
Because I know I didn’t make it up 
My life was broken and blown over where it stood 
So mere confession’s not enough 
Once upon a time we all were lost 
Raised by the power of the Cross 
And to the perishing It’s all just foolishness 
And life to those who understand the cost 

If I’m going crazy I’d like to take you with me

LEGEA LUI CAESAR / CAESAR'S LAW

The emperor made speeches claiming to want peace 
Carried in by tanks and bombs and crushed beneath his feet
Killing what compassion that he may have had
Taking out the criminals and ravaging the land
Suing his own people to fund his little games
Of Indians and cowboys that no one wants to play

Do you even see them? Do you even care? 
Do you even hear them when they cry out in despair?

Consider now the price the missionary pays
Caesar has his law we’re expected to obey
Even when it contradicts the laws of love and charity 
St. Theresa’s been arrested and they’ve thrown away the key
So forget about religion they don’t want it here
We can’t alleviate their pain
We’re not allowed to wipe their tears

So forget about the past propagandas we were fed 
Before we found out on our own
They made up everything they said
Patriotic blindfold - defend yourself or die!
Kill your enemies, kill their children
And your ruler takes the prize

Do you even see them? Do you even care? 
Do you even hear them when they cry out in despair?

SOLITUDINEA SE STRECOARA / THE CREEPING OF SOLITUDE

I was alone when You came calling
A deep dark hole where I had fallen
My mouth was bleeding from an image so obscene
And yours was blended as you drew me from those things
Things that I thought I’d loved
Quicken pulse and pierce the skin
Poison kiss and scarred within
Deep within Your eyes I’ve come to find lovely depression

Denied

Hang me on your symbol where a dose of love will burn
Begging begging let me rest I’m so weary of this curse 
Monster that I am I have not been rejected
So I gladly surrender what I was not forced to give
Quicken pulse and pierce the skin
Poison kiss and scarred within
Deep within Your eyes I’ve come to find lovely depression

Denied

ICH RICHE BLUT / I SMELL BLOOD (PART 1)

When I lay down to sleep they used to torment me 
Always there always whispering in my ear 
Always poking and touching and nagging
‘Til the fear washed over me driving me from my bed 
Oh those terrible fingers I feel those fingers 
I cannot see them get out get out

ICH RICHE BLUT / I SMELL BLOOD (PART 2)

Now when I lay down to sleep 
I know He is watching me
I know He sets His angels around me
As I drift I smell blood 
The Shepherd’s blood 
Lamb’s blood 
Beneath that blood do I live and breathe 
And move and have my being

NOCH EIN VERBRECHEN / ANOTHER CRIME

Darkness darkness constantly creeping in
Beneath the nail behind the eyes and underneath my skin
Malice malice malice is where it begins
Judgment grace and mercy is where it will end

I keep on sinking - committing another crime 
I keep on sinking - committing another crime

Death death death is all that I have
Wicked wicked wicked is all that I am
Love love love is what I will seek
Truth truth and to understand what it means

I keep on sinking - committing another crime 
I keep on sinking - committing another crime

TROT DER KRAEHEN / DESPITE THE CROWS

I’m in love with this day
And all the subtle shades of white and blue and gray 
And the voices of the crows echo through the stones
that mark those peacefully at rest

I’m in love with this day
The crows have all come out to play
And there’s nothing much to do but
to sit and think of you and those
demented things you say

Too much is not enough when my whole life is wrapped up in you

I’m in love with this day
Shadows cast across the way
I was once a lonely shade
Admiring hopeless rays ‘til I finally found the way

I’m in love with this day
Despite the crows with you I’ll stay
Let the world lose its mind a child’s heart is thine
I love you just the same

Too much is not enough when my whole life is wrapped up in you

I’m in love with this day
The crows have all come out to play
And there’s nothing much to do but to sit and think 
Of you and the funny things you say

I’m in love with this day
Despite the crows with you I’ll stay
Let the world lose its mind a child’s heart is thine
I love you just the same

Too much is not enough when my whole life is wrapped up in you

SPIELPLATZ / PLAYGROUND

Go on kid get out of here
You're just in my way
I don't see you I don't hear you
Nothing that you say
I'm too busy living my life
You just drag me down
Here's a dollar, maybe two
Now go find something else to do

I see them every day
With holes all in their clothes
Dirty faces, matted hair
Snot runnig from their nose
I wonder what they had to eat
I wonder where they sleep
Glue bags, porn, and suicide
The devil sells you cheap

Litlle children in the streets
All day, all day
I wonder where thay play
All day, all day

Behind the velvet curtains
Kids act out what they've seen
All caught up in TV shows
And fashion magazines
I wonder when they talk to dad
I wonder what he'd say
If he knew Jill was pregnant
And little Jack was a gay

They say God lives in the sky
Does he really care?
Maybe he's got lots to do
Don't want us in his hair
But I can tell you firsthand
He took me in his arms
God don't beat his children
Or leave them all alone

Skot Shaw: vox, guitars, synth, drum programming
Otto Jensen: bass
Guest Musician: Hilde Bialach (cello on "Primul")
Alternate song titles are in Romanian
Produced by Leper
Recorded and Mixed by Ed Bialach
Mastered by Trevor Sadler at Mastermind Productions in Milwaukee
©&℗ 2009 Grrr Music (ASCAP)

 

 

 

 

 

LEPER
KREISCHEN
2005

Kreischen is a German word, meaning "the shrieking"

GLASS

Through me looking seeing 
every crack in my being hiding nothing 
always knowing what I'm thinking how I'm feeling 
calling for me to know You 

drifting running breaking falling 
always returning always repairing 
fragile trusting always revealing 
always needing always wanting to know You

You see everything....

IN LOVE WITH THE FALL

Sometimes I almost feel as if I just can't stand it 
till the seasons change and the sun fades away
trade a hard life for a comforting death 
and the leaves are falling red, red, red like blood
blood that justifies the wrong 
when it falls from heaven in a gentle song
nothing belongs to the goblin king 
he's a liar, a liar, a liar and a thief 
and dry dead leaves are perfume to me 
and an overcast day can be a beautiful thing

We see the moon is rising
We feel the air is chilling
We see the leaves are changing
We know our season is coming

When the wind blows through her big dark beautiful wings 
it fills my heart with visions of romance, visions of romance
she's a grand excuse for a costume ball
I just wish she lasted all year long
but that's just pleasant fiction!

We see the moon is rising
We feel the air is chilling
We see the leaves are changing
We know our season is coming

SCAR

It's an old scar from an old wound 
acts up every now and then 
it's been there ever since the day it was inflicted 
by an evil little monkey with an evil little smile 
and you know she's just lying 
when she says it doesn't matter 
cause it still hurts even though it isn't bleeding 
and it feels one day she'll go mad all of a sudden 
cause it makes her feel cold 
maybe just a little dirty 
but she shouldn't take it out 
on the ones who really love her 
even though she's been told 
it's completely justifiable 
it still doesn't help after all

Who can love a broken toy?

Even though it's still there 
it's become a whole lot easier 
ever since she gave her life 
to the one who died to save her 
now her blood run white and she
she's thinking clearly 
she won't let anyone tell her that she's crazy 
'cause she knows how she feels 
when she closes her eyes 
and the healing began the healing began the healing
with every day that passes 
you know she's getting stronger 
even though she's got a long way to go 
she's come so far 
too far to look back now

MONSTER

Everybody's got a monster lying just beneath 
when they don't get exactly what they want 
that's when you see their teeth

Don't forget to separate the fact from the fiction 
They never look like Hollywood ever describes 'em

Everybody's got a monster 
doesn't matter who you are 
when you're not paying attention 
that's when they bite off your arms 
hunt 'em down with torches 
just don't look in the mirror 
you might find you're hunting yourself 
wouldn't that be weird

Everybody's got a monster 
it's fun to keep 'em in chains 
but the best advice ever given to me 
was to crucify mine each and every single day

GOD HATER

They cut down the truth because it does not suit 
the lust that drives their blackened heart 
willingly they are...

Isolated from the Lord
turn their back and cut the cord
what they don't like they just ignore
their selfishness looks like their
favorite whore whore whore

Love is give and take and they will only take 
and blame it on the church 
that they claim let them down 
mediocrity is what they choose to see 
when they look at the faith 
and try to shift the blame

They blame God for all the death and destruction 
that they have brought upon themselves 
they are too far out of reach because they choose to be 
and not because the church is as human as they are

Society will not rest until there is not one moral left standing

JUST LIKE YOU

You're so full of lust you can't see straight 
you're always on the hunt for something new to taste 
you know that morality will slow down the pace 
so the lines of conviction are being erased 
you don't even care that your head's messed up 
from filling it up with that sexy stuff 
and you won't fess up because you're just too cool 
I know that you won't because I'm just like you

I'm just like you...

Obsession comes calling and it won't let go 
pornographic images just pollute your soul 
you forget what's right; justify what's wrong 
when you're watching those girls that are dancing all alone 
they like to be watched cause it turns them on 
to know your eyes are on them instead of where they belong 
you'd pretend you're not married when they flirt with you 
I used to do it all the time when I was just like you

It feels so good when you're on your way to hell 
and the only voice you hear is the one below your belt 
trading your commitment for a little show and tell 
doesn't justify the crime when you lie to yourself 
you need get loved you need to get saved 
you need to repent before you understand grace 
you'll have to give account for everything you say and do 
but I can't point fingers cause I'm just like you

PHOTOSENSITIVE

Clear bright hot blinding 
all encompassing burning skin 

Hate cursed hiding like rats 
pain blistering if we touch him we'll die

Run for your life here He comes again
hide in your box He can't get in 
to touch one ray means certain death 
annihilation like the rest 
burst into flames at just one glance 
and crumble into smoldering ash 
retreat retreat deep beneath the earth 
look out the sun has found a way in

Run for your life here He comes again
look out the light is leaking in 
and it begins with Him conviction and pain 
and love and life and healing 
behold the radiance of the truth 
that He has made His peace with us 
and conquered accusation with grace 
look out the Son has found a way in
Truth love redemption is everything

FESTERING

I have heard the voice of holiness 
it beckons to my heart and breaks again 
holding back the sadness try to hide the truth 
I really don't wish to admit 

She doesn't care

I have sworn the oath a thousand times 
and I have fallen short but I have never turned away 
yet the only thing she wants to do is study all my errors 
and ignore your grace

She doesn't care to know your name

There's a little black dot of skepticism 
in the back of her mind 
and it's festering 
and she's moving it down to the bottom of her heart 
where she thinks it's keeping her safe from harm 
but it's festering 
and she thinks it defends her from lies 
but the funny thing is 
it's just festering 
and if only she could see her life 
through the eyes of the one who made her 
she would possibly begin to understand 
that it's festering, it's all festering, festering 
disbelief is festering, festering

IF EVERYTHING WAS GREEN

If everything was green would I stare at the sky? 
If my faith relaxed, would the sky stare back? 
What if you could look into forever 
and all that you could see 
was the grass haunted by the wind? 
If you heard the sky speaking unto thee 
would you bother to answer
or play it off as imagery?

ROMANTISISTIC

Alone he views the rain 
dancing down the window pane 
just another pathetic cliché 
of love discarded and vows misplaced 
she says they've grown apart 
no big deal or broken heart 
wipe away the slate 
with a brand new start 
and a brand new mate

As Christ loves the Church
And gave his life for her

Unbridled carnality is the raper of the least of these 
place us for fools strip us of our rights to choose 
faithful love over solitude 
when it gets hard she'll take the selfish route 
instead of committing to work things out 
but anything worth having at all 
is worth fighting for and discarding walls

Tell me what does it mean 
till death do us part I belong to thee 
shudder to think we'd say such things 
and never ever really take them seriously 
when the two make one 
I guess there's something glorious 
about looking into one's eyes 
and knowing where security lies

MY FRIEND THE GHOUL

We've been in the dark so long 
the light hurts my eyes 
stumbling through 
my foolish clouded frame of mind 

Even though the flesh of sleeping strangers 
leaves a horrible taste on my tongue 
I keep feeding all the same
thinking of a day when life 
wouldn't have to smell so bad 

All the wealth that they tried 
to take with them when they left
I have stolen from their beds 
even though it's all just worthless in my hands 

There's this big stone cross 
in the middle of my yard 
with words chiseled in its face 
they're beautiful words of hope 
that somehow terrify me to read 
and make it hard for me to sleep 

This invisible voice 
keeps on calling, calling, calling, calling
calling me to leave 
has me howling at the moon 
begging for forgiveness 
and freedom from this self-appointed gloom 

And it says 
after all my years of crawling through decay 
it's time for me to see 
oh yes it's time for me to see 
I just cannot save myself 
even though it hurts me to admit 
I know he's right 

'Cause I've tried and I've tried and tried 
oh yes I've tried again 
but I just cannot get the smell 
of excrement out of my soul

 

Leper is: Skot Shaw (lead vocals, guitar, drum programming), Dan Feldstein (bass, synth, lead guitar on "God Hater"), Joby Morey (cello, accordion)
Hilde Bialach: vocals on "If Everything Was Green"
Chris Wood: rhythm guitar on "In Love with the Fall"
Rachel Shaw: spoken word on "In Love with the Fall"
Recorded by Leper at Empathy Studios
Mixed by Ed Bialach at Tone Zone Recording, Chicago, IL
©&℗ 2005 Grrr Records